Giving it up, a piece at a time

A little background:   tsg is a research slut.  Give her a search engine and she can find anything.  Learn anything. she actually had a paying job doing such for a time (the skill is great… her pride in it that makes her a slut, not so much. working on it… anyway…)   tsg is always racing to the next topic, overloading her poor PC with open tabs to be scoured, and delighting in learning something new.

As you may imagine, embracing this new lifestyle has been research intensive.  tsg wanted to be all she could be, as fast as possible, for her Master.  Sounds ok, but once one faces the mountain-range of information, opinions, variations that exist on what the lifestyle is or could be, it’s staggering.

Lots of researching, little learning.  Lots of not knowing which way to turn. Lots of frustrated little slave.

Then Master suggested learning about Gorean ways (a simple, straight forward topic…not), provided a link… and tsg’s brain imploded.  Really. It actually imploded, and little drips of oozy grey matter sopped out of her ears.  Not pleasant.  Not at all.

This is the IMing that followed:


Rules… slave rules, Gorean rules, Protocols, Rituals…. tsg brain may explode.  Master, Your research slut calls “uncle”.  she’s been beat. there’s too much for her to process.  she prays You will just tug her in the right direction, leading her as You will, and not allow her to get bogged down in so much information…. information that may or may not even include something You favor!

7:21 PM


Gee.   another bit of this girl, laid at Your feet.  didn’t even realize…

7:22 PM


Hehehe.  My plans always come to fruition.



tsg wonders, if a the end of this training, this giving up of everything, even her very mind, will ther be anythng left of HER?  After every bit is brought forth and surrendered, not just willingly but with a pleading TAKE THIS FROM ME PLEASE, what will be left? 

Yes of course she will still be herself, her skills and passions still there, but instead of usng them as she wishes, for herself, for helping out as she sees the need, she will be using them to serve HIM, as HE wishes, to help HIM as HE requests.

So simple.

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